Pre-Departure Over Sagacity

The title does not have anything to do with the content of this blog. I wanted to have a title with the same acronym as the PDOS (a kind of seminar) that I have had a couple of days back. So since I brought the PDOS topic, I might as well tell you that yes, in any day from now I will be one of those we so call “OFW’s”. I am not psyched to be one of them even though I know that I was educated to be such primarily because of the effect of mass media to my parents and also because of their dream of a better future for me and them. On the contrary, I am not sad. Well, I am not all hyped and gaga about going abroad but I am glad that finally my career is going somewhere. Even if that somewhere means a thousand of miles away from the people that I love.

I started packing my main bag (and by main I mean the biggest of the three bags that I am planning to bring) but it’s not yet done since I still have a bunch of stuff to add to my supplies. Here’s a secret, I am indeed afraid to die of hunger in a foreign land. Hehe. Just thinking about the fact that I will not be able to eat pork in two years makes me cry.. no joke. If I talk about all the dishes that I am going to miss I’m sure, I can spend the whole day or more so I will stop talking about food now because it’s making me hungry.

I have a million of concerns when it comes to going abroad. I worry that my baggage might exceed the allowable weight for the flight. I worry that I may be wearing the wrong outfit once I land. I worry that my phone won’t work in Jeddah and that my parents and my not too many friends will not be able to contact me and they will think that I was “Flor Contemplacioned” or something. I worry that I won’t understand the doctors, patients and everybody not Filipino there. I worry that I might get loss in the middle of the dessert and the lack of skill of knowing east from west will make me die. I worry about a lot of things but right now my main concern is that I worry that my ticket won’t come.

It’s been nearly a week since I’ve had my PDOS and until now, I haven’t heard from my agency. I am bit happy about it because my sister is having a birthday party by the end of the week which I helped organize so I have to be there. After that, I know I’ll be all crazy thinking as to where that freakin’ agency placed the money that I paid them. The only assurance that I have is the fact that a very close friend was able to go abroad because of them but still, everybody has a different story.

Does this make sense? I mean I am saying that I want to go but not today nor in a couple of days. I am saying that I am so afraid and unsure of what I am about to do with my life well, who would be sure on leaving everything behind and starting form scratch? But I am also saying that I am happy because change means something and most of the time it’s positive. Well, right now I just so want to tell the world “Hey Bring It ON!”. I am so ready to take the next step. Though I am full of apprehensions, I know that I can do it and I don’t need to hear that from anyone else but me.