This will be the very first time that I will write about you. I don't even know if I should tell anybody about what we have because it could be really dangerous. You could possibly be dangerous. But I like you. So much. So f*ck everything else. I'll continue on liking you.
It started like one of those "I'll just try" things until one smile led to a conversation and then suddenly without warning I am back to my "crazy bitch" attitude when I like someone. I am becoming possessive and impossible to deal with. I don't know if it's just my hormones or it's really me, letting my heart take over.. yet again.
I know it's not your fault that you're so lovely, sweet, good to look at, honest, everything. I know. I want to ask you to please don't be yourself when you're around me because I don't know how long I can stop myself from kissing you every single time. I enjoy every bit of you. I want to indulge, to dive in your big bright smile. It's my favorite.
I really feel bad that I have to hide things from you. It's not that I don't trust you or anything. I just don't feel safe around other people. I don't understand myself completely but there are times when I also feel that you're just too good to be true. I don't know. Maybe my problem is not other people or you. Maybe my problem is myself. I am so damaged that I think everybody that comes close is as rotten as everybody else who came and left. I know you might never talk to me again upon finding out what I did. I won't argue if you decide to do that. I deserve worse if you ask me.
One day we'll live a normal life. One day I'll tell my friends about you and how wonderful you are. I just hope that one day comes without you leaving me and getting tired of all these.
It started like one of those "I'll just try" things until one smile led to a conversation and then suddenly without warning I am back to my "crazy bitch" attitude when I like someone. I am becoming possessive and impossible to deal with. I don't know if it's just my hormones or it's really me, letting my heart take over.. yet again.
I know it's not your fault that you're so lovely, sweet, good to look at, honest, everything. I know. I want to ask you to please don't be yourself when you're around me because I don't know how long I can stop myself from kissing you every single time. I enjoy every bit of you. I want to indulge, to dive in your big bright smile. It's my favorite.
I really feel bad that I have to hide things from you. It's not that I don't trust you or anything. I just don't feel safe around other people. I don't understand myself completely but there are times when I also feel that you're just too good to be true. I don't know. Maybe my problem is not other people or you. Maybe my problem is myself. I am so damaged that I think everybody that comes close is as rotten as everybody else who came and left. I know you might never talk to me again upon finding out what I did. I won't argue if you decide to do that. I deserve worse if you ask me.
One day we'll live a normal life. One day I'll tell my friends about you and how wonderful you are. I just hope that one day comes without you leaving me and getting tired of all these.
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